From Nerves to Cheers: Overcoming Public Speaking Anxiety for Your Wedding Speech

The wedding speeches are an important part of any wedding reception and are an opportunity to share heartfelt stories, funny anecdotes and childhood memories. There is often a lot of anticipation from the guests and that can lead to nerves for those who are giving speeches.

Having some anxiety is very natural, but you don’t want these feelings to affect your enjoyment of the day. Here we explore how to overcome public speaking anxiety for your wedding speech.

Understanding the Fear

The fear of speaking in public, or glossophobia, is a natural feeling that originated from the fear of being watched. It’s quite a common fear that affects up to 75% of the population. Most people experience some degree of nervousness or anxiety when they have to say a few words at a wedding party, give a presentation or perform in public. So rest assured you aren’t alone in your fear!
Speech anxiety can range from a slight feeling of nerves to a nearly incapacitating fear. Some of the most common symptoms of public speaking anxiety are trembling, sweating, butterflies in the stomach, dry mouth and a rapid heartbeat.

When it comes to weddings, giving a speech shouldn’t be all that stressful. It’s a happy occasion attended by family and friends, you’ve got their undivided attention and it’s most likely that you’re close to one of the people getting married. In which case, why is it so scary?

There are a number of reasons why giving a wedding speech is more nerve-wracking than it should be. And luckily, many of them are under your control and can be greatly reduced with some planning.

Preparation is key

One of the main causes of speech anxiety is fear of the unknown. This can come from not knowing what to say and feeling unprepared. You may be wondering what the traditional wedding speech order is, rules for each speaker and whether this wedding will be abiding by those norms. So one of the first things you need to do is ask the couple so you know what to expect and what’s expected of you.

Once you know what’s required, you can go ahead and start preparing your wedding toast. You can look at wedding speech examples to get an idea of what to include, depending on whether you have to give a bride’s speech, groom’s speech, best man speech etc.

Here are some helpful wedding speech tips:

1. Start with a strong introduction: Briefly introduce yourself and your relationship to the couple. You can open with a light joke or anecdote, but keep it succinct and relevant.
2. Share a personal story: Did you witness the couple’s love story unfold? Tell a short story that highlights their personalities or their journey together.
3. Offer a toast: Express your well wishes for the couple’s future happiness and fulfilment.
4. End on a high note: Conclude with a heartfelt sentiment or a humorous closing line.

Practice, Practice, Practice

Rehearsal is key to overcoming anxiety. You should practise your speech enough times that you can memorise the structure, but still make it feel relaxed. If you write something and memorise the entire thing word for word, all you’re thinking about is the next thing you have to say. But if you have a strong structure and loose content, you’re more likely to be casual. You also won’t stress about the next line and the speech will flow more naturally.

Practise your speech using a method that works for you. This could be saying it in front of a mirror, recording yourself or practising it in front of a friend or family member. Delivering the speech in front of someone enables them to offer you feedback and constructive criticism. You should also time yourself to ensure you stay within the time limit. Recording yourself and listening to it back can help you identify areas that need improvement in pacing or delivery.

Techniques for Managing Anxiety on the Big Day

Here are some practical tips to manage anxiety on the day of the wedding and deliver your toast with confidence:

• Deep Breathing Exercises: Just before your speech, take slow, deep breaths from your diaphragm. Breathe in for a count of four, hold for four, and exhale slowly for eight. Repeat this a few times to calm your heart rate and centre yourself.
• Mindfulness Techniques: Practise mindfulness to stay present. Focus on your surroundings, the sounds you hear, and the gentle rise and fall of your breath. This can help ground you and reduce anxiety.
• Physical Relaxation Strategies: Simple physical exercises can help release tension. Try progressive muscle relaxation by tensing and releasing different muscle groups in your body. You can also gently roll your shoulders or stretch your neck.

Staying Present During Your Speech

• Visualisation: Before your speech, visualise yourself delivering it confidently. Picture yourself connecting with the audience and speaking with ease.
• Focus on the couple: Refocus your attention on the happy couple. Remind yourself that your speech is a tribute to their love. This positive shift can take the edge off your nerves.
• Anchor yourself in the present: If anxious thoughts creep in, acknowledge them briefly, then gently bring your focus back to the present moment.
• Embrace the imperfections: Don’t strive for perfection. A heartfelt and genuine toast, even with a few minor stumbles, is far more impactful than a robotic delivery. The audience is there to celebrate, not judge.

Conquer your wedding speech jitters

With preparation, practice, and the right mindset, you will be able to overcome your nerves. Remember that everyone experiences some nervousness! By implementing calming techniques and focusing on the positive emotions of the day, you can deliver a memorable wedding speech that celebrates the love of the happy couple.

Looking for memorable wedding entertainment? Get in touch to book a wedding magician and master of ceremonies in one!